Skunk Fu!

Skunk Fu! is an Irish-British animated television series showing the adventures of young Skunk helping to protect the valley by using martial arts.

Killer Bees: Who slammed into our tree?! And who stole our honey?! And which one of you punks called our honey, "tree sap?!"

Skunk: Uh… They did.

Skunk: Man, what a downer.

Snake: Downer? I found the love of my life was a belt, and then I was mistaken for a belt. I wish I was a belt then I could marry her.

Skunk: She wasn't your type anyway.

[After a ninja monkey destroys Skunk's green tea cake, Skunk threateningly vows revenge]

Skunk: Why?! Why did he do this to you?! [gets up on his feet; enraged] This is not over! REVENGE!!!!! [echoes]

Rabbit: [wakes up from his nap] Somebody wants revenge? Sweet!

Skunk: Hey, Rabbit. We're digging under the lake!

Rabbit: What's with the unauthorized break?

Skunk: What?! One more scoop and we'll drown! You had me digging in the wrong direction!

Rabbit: Rule 54: No disparaging the rules.

Skunk: This is so stupid! We're supposed to be partners. I didn't sign up to be your slave! I mean, whoever heard of a rabbit who doesn't dig his own tunnels?! This is totally absolutely…

Rabbit: Rule 12: No lip! No, Skunk, not in my tunnel. That's rule 5.

Skunk: [having enough; agitatedly fed up] That's it! I quit!

Rabbit: Rule 75: You can't quit until I tell you you can quit.

Skunk: You're not the boss of me!

Rabbit: [takes out his rules list] Oh, yes I am. That was rule #1. [Skunk angrily rips up the list] Oh! My rules!

Frog: Behold, your giggle fit has stopped. [Skunk cries sorrowfully] It seems tears accomplish, but, exhaustion could not.

Skunk: [walks away, sadly] You cured me, Master Frog. This is the happiest day of my life.

Panda: Why are you crying, little Skunk?

Skunk: [tearfully] To keep me from laughing, so my mind can be still.

Panda: But your mind cannot be still by thinking upsetting thoughts either.

Skunk: I can't laugh? I can't cry? What can I do? [throws the archery bow to the ground and runs away, sobbing]

Rabbit: Skunk?! What the…?! [his face turns red with rage] You took my monkey head!

Skunk: STOP HIDING BEHIND RABBIT'S DEADLY DEFENSES!!!

Fox: You're so handsome when you wail on big smelly primates.

(after Fox Falling in Love With Rabbit She Kissed Him In His Cheek His Ears Twisted And His Eyes Is Turned Into Hearts And His Eyes Turns Back To Normal)

Crane: [sees Skunk approaching and tells everyone to be quiet] Shh! Here he comes, now.

Skunk: [sees everyone smiling at him; surprised] What?! [gulps shyly] Okay. Before you say anything, I just wanna say that I didn't do it.

Crane: Really? Did you or did you not just face off with Baboon on the pond?

Skunk: I don't need to cool off. I am cool.

Rabbit: [grabs him by the ankle and ropes him into his rabbit hole] Ah, Mr. Skunk, we meet again.

Skunk: Oh, man. I hate it when you do that.

Rabbit: You know, you're not supposed to be on this mission. It's too dangerous.

Fox: Too dangerous? I'll show you too dangerous! [grabs Rabbit and tackles him onto the ground]

Skunk: [rolls up the chores list; annoyed] Aw, come on! I'm so sick of these stupid chores. Hmm. [gets a mischievous idea and pretends to be sick] Oh, I'm so sick and weak. [no one responds; shouting] I said, I'm so sick and weak!

Fox: [runs up to him] Skunk! [Skunk fake clutches his gut while making painful sounds] I'll get help! [runs off as Skunk sits up, grinning mischievously]

[Later… Fox, Ox, and Bird surround Skunk as Turtle uses a fetal stethoscope to check his heart rate]

Ox: [worried] Poor little dude.

Skunk: [faking weakly] Panda gave me a list. [sits up] I have lots of chores. [fake coughs]

Turtle: Oh, dear. [lays Skunk back down]

Rabbit: Ugh. You little faker.

[Fox and Duck gasp offensively]

Fox: How can you say that?! Just look at him.

[Skunk makes big sad puppy eyes]

Rabbit: [scoffs] The little sneak is playing it all for suckers! Only thing wrong with him is a bad case of lazy.

Duck: Don't let Rabbit bother you, sweetie.

Skunk: Oh! Sorry, Tiger. I was practicing a move Panda taught me-- the Butt Buster!

Tiger: I wasn't scared. What you learned at the dojo is just…kid stuff!

Skunk: [offended] "Kid stuff?!"

Skunk: Ignore the pain, Skunk. [groans] A true artist must suffer for his heart. [sobs] Who am I kidding?! I can't take this anymore! Those monkeys have pounded me so hard. [starts acting all maniacally] I'm going insane.

Bird: Great work, Skunk. The monkeys are doing what they want. And what they want to do, is do nothing. In other words, they're doing my job! I hate to say it, but we gotta do something! I think I'm gonna be sick.

Skunk: Okay, you're right. I never thought I'd say this, but we got to get Baboon to take the monkeys back.

Bird: How?

Skunk: We gotta show Baboon he was wrong to fire them, that he needs them.

Bird: Uh-huh.

Skunk: Snake, I've got it! I got Turtle's notebook back! It was easy!

Snake: Yeah, too easy.

Skunk: What do you mean?

Snake: You think that was the real notebook? It was a decoy.

Skunk: [opens the notebook] Wha…?! [flips through the pages of drawings of Baboon blowing raspberry] Oh, man! [throws the fake notebook on the ground in frustration]

Snake: This is where Panda sent me, not you. Now go on home, kid.

Skunk: But you can't send me home. Let me go with you, please? Come on, I made it this far that's got to count for something.

Snake: [sighs] Fine. But you're gonna have to learn a thing or two about this panache.

Rabbit: And as for you, foxy lady... [He Give Teacup to fox] I take my tea green, no sugar.

[Fox Blushes And She Giggles At Rabbit when she holding the teacup]

• Jules de Jongh – Skunk, Duck, and Crane
• Paul Tylak – Panda, Rabbit, and Snake
• Rod Goodall – Dragon and Tiger
• Paul McLoone – Baboon
• Patricia Rodriguez – Fox
• Tony Acworth – Ninja Monkeys, Pig, Ox, Bird, Turtle, Frog, Killer Bees, Mantis, and Fish