One approach you can take is to modifying your followSchema to have the following field as an array and use the concept of population:
var mongoose = require('mongoose')
  , Schema = mongoose.Schema
var userSchema = Schema({
    _id: Number,
    name: String,
    age: Number,
    followers: [{ type: Schema.Types.ObjectId, ref: 'Follow' }]
});
var followSchema = Schema({
    _user: { type: Number, ref: 'User' },
    following: [{ type: Number, ref: 'User' }]
});
var Follow  = mongoose.model('Follow', followSchema);
var User = mongoose.model('User', userSchema);
which you can then query with the some sample users. As an example guide (untested):
var user1_id = 1,
    user2_id = 2,    
    user3_id = 3,   
    user1_following = [], 
    user2_following = [];
var user1 = new User({ _id: user1_id, name: 'User1', age: 31 });
var user2 = new User({ _id: user2_id, name: 'User2', age: 32 });
var user3 = new User({ _id: user3_id, name: 'User3', age: 32 });
user3.save(function (err) {
     if (err) return handleError(err);       
})
user1.save(function (err) {
     if (err) return handleError(err);  
     var follower3 = new Follow({ _user: user3_id });           
     follower3.save(function (err) {
        if (err) return handleError(err);
        // thats it!
     });
})
user2.save(function (err) {
     if (err) return handleError(err);  
     var follower3 = new Follow({ _user: user3_id });         
     follower3.save(function (err) {
        if (err) return handleError(err);
        // thats it!
     });
})
Follow
    .find({ _user: user1_id })
    .exec(function (err, following) {
         if (err) return handleError(err);
         user1_following = following;
   })    
Follow
    .find({ _user: user2_id })
    .exec(function (err, following) {
         if (err) return handleError(err);
         user2_following = following;
   }) 
You can then use Underscore's intersection() which will give you a list of values present in both arrays.
var commonFollowings = _.intersection(user1_following, user2_following);
// In the example above, commonFollowings => [3]