I ended up using parts of Arie's Answer, but I couldn't use his template because I wanted the default Windows Tab style.
My first step was to remove all procedurally generated bindings and converters. Then I used the Tag Property of a TabItem as boolean to mark which tabs should be highlighted.
tabItem.Tag = true;
As Arie said, I needed to overwrite the Template of TabItem in my XAML file. I used this method to generate the default Template of TabItem.
The last step was to define some Setters in Triggers to check if the Tag Property was set to true. In addition you need to define that Tag should be cast to a boolean value instead of a string. For that you need to define sys in your Window element:
<Window ...
xmlns:sys="clr-namespace:System;assembly=mscorlib"
... >
Interpret Property Tag as boolean:
<Trigger.Value>
<sys:Boolean>True</sys:Boolean>
</Trigger.Value>
Resulting TabItem template:
<TabControl ... >
<TabControl.Resources>
<Style TargetType="TabItem">
<Setter Property="Template">
<Setter.Value>
<ControlTemplate TargetType="TabItem">
<Grid SnapsToDevicePixels="True">
<Border x:Name="Bd" BorderBrush="{TemplateBinding BorderBrush}" BorderThickness="1,1,1,0" Background="{TemplateBinding Background}" Padding="{TemplateBinding Padding}">
<ContentPresenter x:Name="Content" ContentTemplate="{TemplateBinding HeaderTemplate}" Content="{TemplateBinding Header}" ContentStringFormat="{TemplateBinding HeaderStringFormat}" ContentSource="Header" HorizontalAlignment="{Binding HorizontalContentAlignment, RelativeSource={RelativeSource FindAncestor, AncestorLevel=1, AncestorType={x:Type ItemsControl}}}" RecognizesAccessKey="True" SnapsToDevicePixels="{TemplateBinding SnapsToDevicePixels}" VerticalAlignment="{Binding VerticalContentAlignment, RelativeSource={RelativeSource FindAncestor, AncestorLevel=1, AncestorType={x:Type ItemsControl}}}"/>
</Border>
</Grid>
<ControlTemplate.Triggers>
<Trigger Property="IsMouseOver" Value="True">
<Setter Property="Background" TargetName="Bd">
<Setter.Value>
<LinearGradientBrush EndPoint="0,1" StartPoint="0,0">
<GradientStop Color="#FFEAF6FD" Offset="0.15"/>
<GradientStop Color="#FFD9F0FC" Offset="0.5"/>
<GradientStop Color="#FFBEE6FD" Offset="0.5"/>
<GradientStop Color="#FFA7D9F5" Offset="1"/>
</LinearGradientBrush>
</Setter.Value>
</Setter>
</Trigger>
<Trigger Property="Tag">
<Trigger.Value>
<sys:Boolean>True</sys:Boolean>
</Trigger.Value>
<Setter Property="Background" TargetName="Bd">
<Setter.Value>
<LinearGradientBrush EndPoint="0,1" StartPoint="0,0">
<GradientStop Color="#FFFFEAC7" Offset="0.15"/>
<GradientStop Color="#FFFFE9C2" Offset="0.5"/>
<GradientStop Color="#FFFFE1AD" Offset="0.5"/>
<GradientStop Color="#FFFFDDA3" Offset="1"/>
</LinearGradientBrush>
</Setter.Value>
</Setter>
</Trigger>
<Trigger Property="IsSelected" Value="True">
<Setter Property="Panel.ZIndex" Value="1"/>
<Setter Property="Background" TargetName="Bd" Value="#FFF9F9F9"/>
</Trigger>
<MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Condition Property="IsSelected" Value="True"/>
<Condition Property="Tag">
<Condition.Value>
<sys:Boolean>True</sys:Boolean>
</Condition.Value>
</Condition>
</MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Setter Property="Background" TargetName="Bd" Value="#FFFFE5C1"/>
</MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Condition Property="IsSelected" Value="False"/>
<Condition Property="IsMouseOver" Value="True"/>
</MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Setter Property="BorderBrush" TargetName="Bd" Value="#FF3C7FB1"/>
</MultiTrigger>
<Trigger Property="TabStripPlacement" Value="Bottom">
<Setter Property="BorderThickness" TargetName="Bd" Value="1,0,1,1"/>
</Trigger>
<Trigger Property="TabStripPlacement" Value="Left">
<Setter Property="BorderThickness" TargetName="Bd" Value="1,1,0,1"/>
</Trigger>
<Trigger Property="TabStripPlacement" Value="Right">
<Setter Property="BorderThickness" TargetName="Bd" Value="0,1,1,1"/>
</Trigger>
<MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Condition Property="IsSelected" Value="True"/>
<Condition Property="TabStripPlacement" Value="Top"/>
</MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Setter Property="Margin" Value="-2,-2,-2,-1"/>
<Setter Property="Margin" TargetName="Content" Value="0,0,0,1"/>
</MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Condition Property="IsSelected" Value="True"/>
<Condition Property="TabStripPlacement" Value="Bottom"/>
</MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Setter Property="Margin" Value="-2,-1,-2,-2"/>
<Setter Property="Margin" TargetName="Content" Value="0,1,0,0"/>
</MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Condition Property="IsSelected" Value="True"/>
<Condition Property="TabStripPlacement" Value="Left"/>
</MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Setter Property="Margin" Value="-2,-2,-1,-2"/>
<Setter Property="Margin" TargetName="Content" Value="0,0,1,0"/>
</MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger>
<MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Condition Property="IsSelected" Value="True"/>
<Condition Property="TabStripPlacement" Value="Right"/>
</MultiTrigger.Conditions>
<Setter Property="Margin" Value="-1,-2,-2,-2"/>
<Setter Property="Margin" TargetName="Content" Value="1,0,0,0"/>
</MultiTrigger>
<Trigger Property="IsEnabled" Value="False">
<Setter Property="Background" TargetName="Bd" Value="#FFF4F4F4"/>
<Setter Property="BorderBrush" TargetName="Bd" Value="#FFC9C7BA"/>
<Setter Property="Foreground" Value="{DynamicResource {x:Static SystemColors.GrayTextBrushKey}}"/>
</Trigger>
</ControlTemplate.Triggers>
</ControlTemplate>
</Setter.Value>
</Setter>
</Style>
</TabControl.Resources>
<TabItem></TabItem>
</TabControl>