You have wrong parameter the replace format in this case  is not  set columnname = replace(columnname,'you','u')   but  replace(columnname,'u','you')
and you should also check for word  boundaries .. ' u '
and you could use also like  
update table 
set columnname = replace(columnname,' u ',' you ') 
where columnname  like '% u %' ; 
but if you have several cases the you should manage each case properly eg for ' u ' and  ' u,' 
update table 
set columnname = case when columnname  like '% u %'
                        then  replace(columnname,' u ',' you ') 
                      when columnname  like '% u,%'
                        then  replace(columnname,' u,',' you,') 
                 end
where columnname  like '% u %'
OR columnname  like '% u,%' ; 
If you have mysql 8 you could use regexp_replace
 update table 
 set columnname = REGEXP_REPLACE(columnname,'[[:<:]]u[[:>:]]','you') 
 where columnname regexp '[[:<:]]u[[:>:]]';
..
select REGEXP_REPLACE('test u tesp','[[:<:]]u[[:>:]]','you') 
from dual
where 'test u tesp' regexp '[[:<:]]u[[:>:]]';