I've searched this all over and all I get is webfonts. I don't want a webfont, I mean a font that I can install to my pc and see emojis instead of having to got to a site like iemoji.com to translate
I'm running Windows Vista so maybe that's why?
I'm going to keep this vague so that I don't say something that's wrong.
At the lowest level, your computer doesn't know what letters are. It only knows numbers. Because of this, it pretends that certain numbers are certain letters, simple enough. However, there's a lot of different ways to do this, and lots of people have tried making their own mappings. ASCII and Unicode are two very popular ones, and you can look up exactly what number means what letter or character for those standards. ASCII is an 8 bit system, meaning it can recognize up to 256 unique characters. I believe Unicode can recognize up to 2147483647.
Essentially, your computer looks at characters using a numbering system that doesn't include emoji. While it might seem easy to get one that does, the particular system that your computer uses doesn't even have enough slots to fit all the emoji you would want to use!
So, there's no way you can add emoji to windows at a system level. You would have to use applications that would only recognize them within the scope of that application (which is what I presume webfont is?)